December is for Wishes

won't you take this cup from me? 
fear has stolen all my sleep. 
if tomorrow means my death, 
pray You'll save their souls with it. 

let the songs I sing bring joy to You. 
let the words I say profess my love. 
let the notes I choose be Your favorite tune. 
Father, let my be after you. 

in this hour I see who I am is not just me.
give me strength to die myself,
so Love can live to tell the tale. 

Father, let my heart be for you. 


(garden - needtobreathe)

The holidays are always an interesting time with my family. Lots of laughter, fake karaoke singing, games, general lack of any sort of polish, and screaming children make for a glorious uproar. As I grow older, I find that the holidays are a great source of joy, while at the same time being a time when I feel very alone and troubled in all the expected ways...wondering why I'm still single, living in the middle of nowhere, feeling disconnected from people that I love, and continually wanting to know when God is going to allow for the 'next step.' At the same time, loving the chance to be around my family to show them the Lord's mercy and love. To share with them the real reason we gather and celebrate. 

[Enter conflict]: I am the least worthy person to carry the message of Christ. I refuse to change. I doubt. I lose words. Fail to explain things the way they should be explained. Show the worst of myself to the people I have known all of my life. I am a miserable example of the grace and mercy that has been extended to me. In a family full of nonbelievers...people I love...I shut down and lose precious opportunities to be Jesus to my family. 

[Enter resolution]: For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and of peace there will be no end, on the throne of David and over his kingdom, to establish it and to uphold it with justice and with righteousness from this time forth and forevermore.  -Isaiah 9:6,7 (ESV)

The Christmas message is that there is 
hope for a ruined humanity. 
-Packer

Even before the creation of the world, God was thinking of how desperately I would need him. Before I was close to living, God's plan for my life was put into motion. Though I am the worst of sinners, unworthy of being called a child of God, his love was extended to me through his son.

The Christmas message is that there is hope for a ruined humanity. That hope is that God's word is true. He will do what he says. 



Seek the Lord while He may be found; call to Him while he is near. Let the wicked one abandon his way and the sinful one his thoughts; let him return to the Lord, so He may have compassion on him, and to our God, for He will freely forgive.  -Isaiah 55:6,7

There are some girls I know that like to give each month a theme.

There's MeLissa

And Lydia.

And Grace.

It makes me smile because they give their whole heart and belief to that theme. For one month, they commit to that one thing, in hopes of bettering their lives and the lives of others. 

September was for ladies. October was for magic. November was for love. 

December is for wishes. 

My wish: that December would be about faith. That I would dare to commit to a deeper faith...the kind that will stretch and grow me. The kind that will bring about real, life-altering change. The kind that can only be explained by the One I was created to praise. 

Potter Watch 2010

Password: Gryffindor.

Somebody did this with their time. Maybe even their life. Enjoy.




Stay tuned for the next episode. Password: Expelliarmus.

Potter Watch 2010 -- Things Lord Voldemort Tweets

Password: Mad-Eye






Shocking truth: the LOST island & Azkaban are the same place. Smoke monster was a dementor. Think about it...


Prince William is trending because he's engaged to Kate Middleton. Yawn. The only prince I'm interested in is the Half Blood Prince.


 anyone, even yourself. Be honest, you're usually wrong.


Do not reach for the stars. They are giant balls of fiery gas. Waste of time.


I am beautiful on the inside and outside. Mainly the outside.


It's Veteran's Day in America. One day I hope to be a victorious veteran of the war against stupidity. Unfortunately, it's still going on.


Hide your kids, Hide your wife.


One of the Chilean miners finished the New York Marathon. What the hell did you do today?


Always remember that alcohol doesn't make people do stupid things. People do stupid things because they're stupid.


Lil Wayne is free, baby. I might be more excited about this than when I released the dementors from Azkaban.


You know what I can't stand? People.


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.




Stay tuned for the next episode. Password: Gryffindor.


**follow on Twitter @Lord_Voldemort7

Potter Watch 2010

Password: Mooney

WARNING!!!


Stay tuned for the next episode. Password: Mad-Eye.

Potter Watch 2010

One week from today, I'll be on my way to Pensacola, FL to celebrate a birthday and the return of Harry Potter (and frienemies) to the big screen.


I won't lie...I am beyond excited. Here's why:
1. Potter-a-thon with three of the people I love the most...taking it back to the hallways and couch cushions at NGU 2009. 
2. I have my own wand...and time-turner.
3. I'm not afraid to use a silent spell on someone. Go on, try me.
4. Wizards, wands, dragons, goblins and house elves are better than vampires any day. 
5. Words like "Gringott's," "disapparate," "unforgivable curse," "occlumency," "veritaserum," and "Albus Dumbledore" just make my heart happy.





Stay tuned for the next episode. Password: Mooney.

...all photos from weheartit.

To Jury...or Not to Jury


I'm not quite sure of the process, but I've never been called for jury duty. I'm suppose I'm just counting myself lucky thus far. My mom, sister and dad have each been called multiple times...not that they've served every time...but they've been called.

Part of me thinks that it might be interesting to sit through a case, hear the facts, and take part in the process...but the other part of me thinks it might be extremely stressful to have the fate of someone in the hands of my interpretation of the facts and evidence...even when it's cut and dry.

My mom is serving jury duty today (and possibly tomorrow). In honor of her performing this civic duty, here are some hints to help you (maybe) in the future.

1. In many states, it is possible to demonstrate that you are unable to serve on a jury for financial reasons. Proof of employment and/or wages, in addition to comprehensive financial statements and the previous year's taxes should all be brought to court with you on the first day you report to jury duty. If you can persuade the judge that it is unfeasible for you to miss work, you will have lost only one day of your time. Lying here would be inadvisable.

2. Request a change of date. If you can get a change of date, ask for December. In December, there is a far greater chance that most trials will be delayed or moved, and you may never actually get called in, while at the same time you are still fulfilling your civic duty.

3. Use a risky loophole if you're in California. The following point constitutes fraud if you are caught and could result in possible 20 days in jail. One tack to try: Explain to the judge that you have a pressing, pressing commitment in the next week or two, and that you would be happy to re-schedule your jury service two weeks hence because of this very pressing work or personal commitment. Most judges will agree to let you come back and repeat jury service in two weeks, even if your commitment doesn't rise to the level needed for him to just let you go scott-free. However (and here's the catch), by state law you will have served your jury service already merely by dint of having appeared for a day, even without being selected for trial. When you return to the jury room, instead of getting your jury service rescheduled they will hand you piece of paper certifying you have completed it. Voila!

4. Attend jury duty if you don’t come up with an acceptable excuse. "Play smart." Many attorneys wants jurors whom they can persuade one way or the other. Try to demonstrate education, intelligence, and logical reasoning. In many jurisdictions, lawyers, judges, and police officers are categorically barred from jury duty because they are too informed on the subject. (In California this applies only to the latter.) Similarly, doctors are almost always excused from malpractice cases, bankers from embezzlement cases, etc. It is not, however, unheard-of for a sitting judge to be seated as a juror.

5. Mention the right of a jury to "veto." In short, it allows a jury to return a verdict of "innocent" when the accused is clearly guilty, because the jury disagrees with the law that was broken. You probably want to read up on this before your jury duty. This is a right held by the juror and affirmed by the Supreme Court, but one that both prosecutors and judges usually deeply loathe, if they even acknowledge its existence. You will almost certainly be excused from the jury for holding unacceptable views, but if not, you will be better prepared for the experience from your research.

6. But remember, once you have been sworn in always tell the truth.

7. Just say you're a student. In most cases, missed work can be made up, but not missed lessons/lectures. it's a perfect excuse.

8. George Carlin offered the best suggestion: Tell the judge you'll make a great juror, as you can spot guilty people just by looking at them.

http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Out-of-Jury-Duty
O God, do not keep silent; be not quiet, O God, be not still.
-Psalm 83:1

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.
-Lamentations 3:22-26

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion - to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.
-Isaiah 61:1-3

I called on your name, O Lord, from the depths of the pit. You heard my please: "Do not close your ears to my cry for relief." You came near when I called you, and you said, "Do not fear." O Lord, you took up my case; you redeemed my life.
-Lamentations 3:55-58

"For who is God besides the Lord? And who is the Rock except our God? It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect."
-2 Samuel 22:32-33

"If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the god we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."
-Daniel 3: 17-18

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
-Matthew 5:6

Yet, O Lord, you are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.
-Isaiah 64:8

Blessed is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway. For whoever finds me finds life and receives favor from the Lord. But whoever fails to find me harms himself; all who hate me love death.
-Proverbs 8:34-36

But as for me, I will always have hope...
-Psalm 71:14a

Yet I am poor and needy; may the Lord think of me. You are my help and my deliverer; O my God, do not delay.
-Psalm 40:17

Definition of the Week

1enough adj \i-ˈnəf, ē-, ə-\

: occurring in such quantity, quality, or scope as to fully meet demands, needs, or expectations <enough food for everyone>

 ...this is one I'm committing to memory...
For a while now, I've been wrestling with ridiculous feelings of inadequacy, doubt, lameness, loneliness, crazy, and almost everything else under the sun. And by a while...I mean a good while. This isn't a two-week fever...it's more like a months-long battle with everything I don't know how to handle.

I know the Lord has plans for me, and I believe that...but this waiting thing is starting to take its toll on me. And I'm letting it.

I struggle with consistency in the Word and prayer. 
My attitude is horrible.
Sleep is off. 
Rather than being excited for others, I find jealousy creeping in.
...etc.

I was talking with a friend last night about yesterday's message at Brentwood Baptist Church in Nashville, TN.
Then Jesus came from Galilee to the Jordan to be baptized by John. But John tried to deter him, saying, "I need to be baptized by you, and do you come to me?" Jesus replied, "Let it be so now; it is proper for us to do this to fulfill all righteousness." Then John consented. As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and lighting on him. And a voice from heaven said, "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased."  -Matthew 3:13-17
In that moment, God was pleased with his Son. In that moment, God said to those who would hear it that Jesus was enough. The Son that came to this earth to fulfill all righteousness by living a sinless life, taking the world's sin upon his shoulders, being crucified on a cross...shedding His pure, sinless blood for every undeserving soul in the world...was enough. And God was pleased with what his son had done. 


Obey. 


I'm so worried about why there aren't any jobs. Why I'm stuck in Illinois. Why no boys love me. Why everyone else gets to have friends living in the same time zone/city/house. Why I'm not hearing from God. Why nothing is "working out" for me. 


Me. Me. Me. Me. Me.   ...how selfish. 


While I was busy thinking about myself, I lost sight of who He is.
While I was busy thinking about myself, I quit trying.
While I was busy thinking about myself, I let Satan in.


I'm not promised a glamorous life. I'm not even promised an easy/good life. But I am promised a friend that sticks closer than a brother. I am promised the Healer, Sustainer, Maker and Ruler of all things. 


I'm going to quit thinking that He's forgotten about me. 
I'm going to start believing that my life has worked out...just not the way I planned it. 
I'm going to remember that He is good...and He is enough for me. 

My Broken Cisterns Never Could Stay Filled

So I'm not sure why it always flows downhill
Why broken cisterns never could stay filled
I've spent ten years singing gravity away
But the water keeps on falling from the sky

And here tonight while the stars are blacking out
With every hope and dream I've ever had in doubt
I've spent ten years trying to sing these doubts away
But the water keeps on falling from my eyes

And heaven knows, heaven knows
I tried to find a cure for the pain
Oh my Lord! To suffer like you do
It would be a lie to run away

So blood is fire pulsing through our veins
We're either writers or fools behind the reigns
I've spent ten years trying to sing it all way
But the water keeps on falling from my tries

And heaven knows, heaven knows
I tried to find a cure for the pain
Oh my Lord! To suffer like you do
It would be a lie to run away
A lie to run
It would be a lie
It would be a lie to run away

It keeps on falling 
Water keeps on falling from my eyes

And heaven knows, heaven knows
I tried to find a cure for the pain
Oh my Lord! To suffer like you do
It would be a lie to run away 



(Jon Foreman-The Cure for Pain)

Definition of the Week

  • ex·haust·ed Adjective   /igˈzôstid/
    Synonyms:
    • adjective: spent, weary, worn-out, tired
    • Drained of one's physical or mental resources; very tired
      • I was cold and exhausted
      • she returned home, exhausted from her day in the city
    • (of resources or reserves) Completely used up
      • Karl spat, his patience suddenly exhausted





Fay-Vo-Rit


It's no lie. I've always been partial to October. 

Maybe it's because of football.


















Maybe it's because the leaves have really started to change and the colors are gorgeous. Maybe it's because of playoff baseball and the World Series. Maybe it's because of corn mazes and costumes and too much candy.













Maybe it's because of bonfires and haunted houses and hayrides. 
Maybe it's because I get to celebrate my birthday. 

Maybe it's because you get to carve pumpkins and light them up with fire. Maybe it's because the people in Kenova, West Virginia devote themselves to an amazing array of pumpkins each year...at one house.
















Maybe it's because you get to run around screaming "BOO" and aren't held accountable for it. Maybe it's because Harry Potter seems the most real in October.

Man. What a great month. 



I'm Not Your Ghost Anymore...


I know I can't take one more step towards you
Cause all that's waiting is regret
And don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore
You lost the love I loved the most

I learned to live half a life
And now you want me one more time

And who do you think you are
Running 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are

I hear you're asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms

I learned to live half a life
And now you want me one more time

And who do you think you are
Running 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are

And it took so long just to feel alright
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
Cause you broke all your promises
And now you're back
You don't get to get me back

And who do you think you are
Running 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

And who do you think you are
Running 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

Who do you think you are


























Christina Perri -- Jar of Hearts